i am a normal human being

you can *click* *click* *click* to advance the text and get excellent productivity appraisal

or you can just sit back and let it flow

EDIT : should have called this i’m a useless human being

EDIT2 :  it’´s lagging and generally become unplayable because all operating systems on all plateforms (except Linux) are no longer creating localy the text to speech, but downlowding it from web, which is a fucking waste of ressources and works like shit, it’s fucking stupid and wtf and I have no time and energy to look into it, it's like a whole metaphor of this fucked up system we live in breaking something that used to work well to replace it with a thing that doesn't work but consumes huge amount of public/socialized ressources, the fuck

EDIT3 : If you're a Linux guru you can maybe make it work with a decent voice synthesis. I'm not so mine only speaks robotic unlanguage I don't understand and so for fucks sake I can't even make a damned video of it

EDIT4 : if you tell me I swear too much I swear to you I'm gonna swear even more.

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my opinion is that it sounds better with French text-to-speech than your average English accent (you can change it in your browser's language settings)
- the Firefox voice is just excellent

I've workshopped a responsive mobile version that is not total shit so you can try it but play on your computer if you can because the images show  better

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image credits : tenor.com
only available until they take all the gifs down

I used this fantastic tool : Slaptrash

Thank you Internet 💜